Inside the Mind - Geoffrey R. Jonas

Simply put, the death of my sister. After her death, I began to research how such a thing could happen. I had already been studying Substance Use Disorder (SUD) and trauma for many years; however, this was the first time I started looking directly into my family. The writing began as essays, discussing the abuse and trauma and how it relates to SUD. Once I started connecting the dots between trauma and SUD, I wanted to incorporate real-life examples of our experiences to better communicate that relation.

This book was a way for me to process the loss of my sister. I struggled to understand how it could have gotten so bad that she had to die. Through this process I discovered my own history of abuse, as well as how bad the abuse was for her. I needed to understand why. The title has a double meaning. First, to represent the process of how one becomes broken through abuse and trauma. Second, to describe living with Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (CPTSD), as it feels to me. There’s a process to being broken by our parents, and there’s living with the consequences of the feeling of being broken.

Well, I did live with them for a very long time. However, learning about their history and what they went through, how that became a generational insight, allowed me to better understand their tragedy as well.

As we have a very short summer where I live in northern Canada, so writing is primarily a winter hobby. I take my daughter to school, come home, and putter around the house. If I feel like writing, I'll do some. I don't force it.

Mostly having control over my own work. It is pleasant to see reader's response and to be able to personally engage with them if I want to. It's a lot of work to promote and market the book, but in the end it is worth it.

Perfectionism and Impostor Syndrome. My perfectionism is a result of the abuse where I was regularly criticized and judged if everything wasn’t perfect, or made to feel shame about mistakes. My Impostor Syndrome, also a result of the abuse, is when I am complimented or positively judged for my work and I can not accept it because I feel that I do not deserve it. The consequence of these two factors is procrastination. I will avoid the work so that I do not feel the shame and low self-esteem that occurs when things are not as good as I want them to be, or the anxiety of a review that isn’t perfect.

I use Word primarily. I have ProWritingAid as an add-on that I used to help with grammar and suggestions. I do not let it write for me, and I don't follow every suggestion. The Reedsy website was helpful in finding an editor and as a guide to help me write and publish the book.

Follow your heart and say what you want to say. We are often too concerned with how others will receive what we are trying to convey. We can’t please everyone. There will always be people who don’t like what we have to say. Don’t mind them. Know and trust yourself. Also, just write. Put your head down and do it. If you’re struggling, take a break. It’s not going anywhere, and it is not a sprint, but a marathon. Keep at it.

Sporadically. I'm self-published, so promoting and marketing the book can be expensive. I add a little more every month. Another website, an interview like this one, some shameless self-promotion on Bluesky or Facebook. But it all adds up in the end. I have been approached by several marketers, so we'll see where that leads.

I am not currently working on another book. This book was very difficult for me to write. I do have some ideas rattling around in my head, perhaps a follow-up called “Getting Fixed”, but most likely I will be trying my hand at fiction. I am an avid reader of fantasy and science fiction and have many character backgrounds, stories, and ideas written throughout the years that may come together into a science fantasy series.